I have been trying all week to write another entry but I just haven't felt up to it. Some days it is hard to sit down and really think about how I am feeling because I have been feeling so lonely without mom and reality is getting harder to face.
On the 27th it had been 2 months since mom passed... It seems like so long ago that I actually talked to her but in all reality we are just getting started on life without her. Life has changed even from when she died. The cards and the encouraging words are few and far between, every ones focus has switched to some other grieving family, and more devastation has come to so many other people in the world. I understand this is how it goes, but in all honesty I am having a harder time the more time passes. Sometimes it is just hard to breathe...
These pictures were taken about 3-5 weeks before mom died. My kids loved their Nana so much and we are trying so hard to remember everything we can about her. She took such good care of them and loved them as if they were her own children. Mom babysat them all at least once a week up until about 2 months before she died. She was such a great Nana and I feel so bad for my boys that they will not get to make more memories with her and experience her love anymore. There really is nothing like a grandmas love...
We have one week until her birthday and Mothers day. Yay...
So I am sitting here just trying to breathe...
Hi Kelli,
ReplyDeleteI got to spend a little time with Trey on Tuesday at the soccer fields. He wanted to come with me to watch Clara play for a while. The weather was crazy, all stormy and then a beautiful rainbow appeared. Trey turned to me and said "look a rainbow, my nana in heaven made that"! He also said that there are alot of rainbows around and nana makes them all! That is one smart little guy! It's those little things that will help your boys remember how special your mom was. Just know that I still think about you often:)
~Leah
I have been thinking about you a lot knowing what next week is going to bring to you and your family. Two big days that are going to have huge holes in them. Nothing can be said to ease the emptiness you're up against but just know that on Mother's Day you have 3 little boys that love you and look up to you just as much as you do to your mom. Let them celebrate you for the awesome mom you are!!! Love ya!
ReplyDeleteYou haven't been forgotten. I know how hard it is when everyone else goes on with their lives and you're still trying to figure it out. Hang in there, try to keep breathing, and allow yourself to cry whenever you need to. I think about you frequently, and wonder how you are doing. The next week is going to be a tough one, but you'll get through. Two more special days to cross off the list, ya know? June is Father's Day and my dad's birthday, so I get it. You are so loved, and never forgotten. I'm here anytime you need me.
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